People are everywhere, but the artist is alone. Streets are full of crowd, but the artist is alone. Lots of friends on that Facebook friend list, but the artist is alone.
We live in a world where the internet and technology are in abundance. We are connected with a number of people all at once. But there is a breed of people living around us, who we are completely ignorant of. They are the most creative and crazy beings on this planet earth. I being an artist can relate to its incompleteness. There have been instances in my life too where I have been left deserted and all on my own to figure out things. Things which are completely out of order for me.
Like they say, highly intellectual beings always find it difficult to cop up with physical realities around them and hence tend to live their life in complete bitterness. Always living in a state of battle with their inner conflicts.
My life has been like that too. I have met so many people in my life who are all gone now, leaving me to my own miseries. There were people who promised to stand aside and walk through all the ups and downs of life, people who were once the lifeline of my life. But to now they are nowhere. There were friends who betrayed and now there are friends whom I am not sure to call friends or not. One thing that hurts me the most is that when people who are very close to you start behaving abnormally. There are some friends of mine who started behaving in an abrupt manner resulting in an uneasy and not so comfortable ground between us. The thing is, even I work my whole day. I too have my whole career and life ahead of me lying in an unknown terrain of uncertainties. But to abandon the people, who once were close to you is not a solution to the problem.
I have spent half of my life battling with my own demons. Spirituality, Meditation, God, Universe, Creator, purpose, these are the things I have been dealing with in my life. And I am still dealing with them. There are questions which are still unanswered. There is a streak of anxiety that always surrounds me, a hollowness that always surpasses me. For the most part of my life, people have always misunderstood me. As I advanced in my spiritual process, I somehow lost myself in the process and gets fragmented. Sometimes I lose my temper for no reasons, sometimes I am so much into myself that I don’t feel an urge to be in continuous contact with the reality around me. Sometimes I am so much involved in my own fantasies that I cut myself off from the ground reality and that affects me very much. But the problem is that I do it as a part of the process for my creative self to express something, but others tend to believe it as my reality and they assume it to be my arrogance.
The world around me is in a continuous effort to change an artist into a meaningless and senseless creature, like most people around us.
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